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What do you think of when you hear the word “perfection?” The dictionary tells us it is freedom from fault or defect. The Bible gives us several examples in the Old and New Testaments; verses such as Matthew 5:48 – “Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.” and Psalm 19:7 “The law of the Lord is perfect, refreshing the soul. The statutes of the Lord are trustworthy, making wise the simple.” I used these two specific verses because they were part of the scripture reading for today (Matthew 5:43-48 and Psalm 19:1-8). Referring back to my original question, perfection and what it means to you? I had always heard the phrase, “Practice makes perfect” when I was growing up. I played a lot of sports when I was younger and I took that phrase very seriously. I wanted to be the best and so I spent many hours developing my skills. It wasn’t until I was in college and I had a coach tell me that practice does not make one perfect. I was stumped for a moment and then my coach went on to explain to me what she meant. If one practices a skill incorrectly it does not matter how many hours are spent towards perfection because it can’t and will never be attained, why you ask…only perfect practice makes perfect. At that moment it was as if someone turned a switch on and I suddenly understood. Over the years I have developed a new appreciation for perfection and it’s mastery. My goals in athleticism was to be perfect, the realistic aspirations may have been out of my grasp but it did not deter me from striving for it. The same is true in my Christian life, I am sinful but Jesus loves me and when I obey and study His Words He is working in me to mold and make me “perfection.” Just because I am sinful does not mean I don’t strive and desire perfection that can only come from God. My encouragement and prayer for you as well as for myself is that we abide in God as stated in, Colossians 3:1-2 “Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” Everyday is a new opportunity to start with a clean slate, a new day to strive towards perfection in Christ Jesus! My prayer for today is that we will not let our sinful nature hinder us from striving for the perfection that comes from God, Amen!

“We need not despair even in our worst, for our failures are forgiven. The only fatal thing is to sit down content with anything less than perfection.” ~C.S.Lewis (Mere Christianity)

~Blessings and Peace~

Reference:
Preparing for Easter by C.S.Lewis
(NIV) New International Version of the Bible

Embracing Glory. What does that look like? Since reading day two of my devotional I’ve been trying to understand its meaning and trying to formulate a visual for myself. My thoughts have led me to this insight, unique and personal is what Embracing Glory is to me. God created us all differently and seeks to have individual relationships with each of us. By definition glory means to bring praise and praise means good things. How we experience “embracing Glory” will be different yet familiar to all believers. As believers, all our praise is to God for all the “good” things He has and will do for us. The good in parentheses, refers to Romans 8:28 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Trusting God when we don’t understand is “Embracing Glory.” Recognizing that daily and moment to moment we are surrounded by God’s love, grace and mercy we can see and feel God embracing us and we can embrace God and all His Glory! The next time you are outside and the sun is shining down and you feel the tingling of your skin know that you are in the embrace of our Savior! Remember, embracing Glory will be different for all of us, my favorite way to embrace God and give Him praise and glory is driving in my car, often to no specific destination and I sing to Him. The songs I sing I learned as a child in Sunday school, even if I mess a word up I keep going because I imagine that it’s just me and Jesus sitting together and it’s lovely. I also experience embracing Glory when I have lunch with the JULIETS, Esther’s Circle, prayers with friends, walking in the park…etc, find things that cause you to breathe deeper, think broader and love endlessly.

~Blessings and Peace~

References:
Romans 8:22-27 “We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the first fruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.”

Psalm 1:1-3 “Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither— whatever they do prospers.”

JULIETS – Avon Christian Church Avon, IN (JULIETS – Jolly Unique Ladies Informally Eating Together Somewhere)

Esther’s Circle – Avon Christian Church Avon, IN (Women’s Bible Study 7pm every third Tuesday of the month hosted in someone’s home)

Preparing for Easter by C.S.Lewis

For a vast number of people, the purpose of Lent is the preparation of the believer through prayer, doing penance, repentance of sins, almsgiving, atonement, and self-denial. It is all these things and it is also about drawing closer to God, which can include the letting go of things. On this first day of Lent my heart and mind were burdened with questions I could not and did not want to answer. My deepest desire was for someone to give me the answers I seek, it was through my wrestling of my heart and mind that I realized I could easily get answers from others but those answers and truths would not be mine to embrace. My stubbornness took hold of me and I allowed it to consume me for a time. I have held steady to a journey I started nearly 4 years ago and remain steadfast on that journey. I set out to find clarity, clarity in who I am, whom I belong to and clarity to my purpose. As I have traveled through life these past few years God has revealed to me moments of clear vibrant clarity and has caused me to search deeper into who I am. This search has led me to explore authenticity, in many ways it is the mirrored reflection of clarity. The one thing I am absolute about is that I am a child of God. I look back on the different stages of my life and I see confidence, bravery, strength and humility; I also see fear, vulnerability, sadness and loneliness. There has been and remains a constant in all of this, it is God! My parents sent my brother and I to Sunday school as toddlers, I have such fond memories of my teachers, from the Bible stories they taught me to the songs they taught me about Jesus and His love for me. I have continued being a part of church throughout my life, some years more active than others; nonetheless, my resolve is I am nothing without God. My hope is that through sharing my thoughts and my stories others will search for their own truths. The words I write here are my truths, I cannot give you answers to your questions just as I cannot take your truths and answers as mine. I hope that I am not confusing anyone, so to be clear…I cannot tell you the answers you seek, I cannot ask someone to give me answers…our truths must come from within. Clarity can only come from God. It is not my responsibility to judge you or anyone else. We all will stand before God one day and will answer for what we did or did not do. My desire is to not be a hinderance to anyone, to share hope and love, give respect not necessarily approval. As I watch the news or read the news, there is so much hate and division on a global scale but what’s worse is, its next door, it’s in our neighborhoods, our schools, our churches, our cities, our states our nation…do you see the rate of infection and infliction? We, our individual humanness does not want to be a clone identical to everyone else and we don’t want to stand out as being different either. When did the scales tilt and become so unbalanced that respect and different cannot stand together? Without competition and dominance? When did Christians start hating other Christian’s because they worship a little differently? Jesus’ charge to the believers was and is to spread the Good News! God alone is the judge of one’s heart. We are to love one another, to pray for one another. I encourage, I challenge you to join me in simply loving others, loving is not approval, or even agreeing with…it is giving respect to another human being that was created by God, for God’s purposes. The title of the Lenten lesson I read for today was “Getting Closer to God”. An insight I found was the closer I am to God the less I concern myself with my perceived wrongs that others might be doing. I realize I am being a bit vague and that is only because I do not wish to place restraints on your own ideas and ideals. I will; however, state a few things I struggle with and seek clarity to reflect love and not opinion: politics, religion, government, race, sexual orientation, war, humanitarianism, pride, loyalty, commitment. The scripture from my devotional was Matthew 11:27-30 and Psalm 90:1-6. My prayer is that you find it helpful and soothing to your soul.

~Blessings and Peace~

Matthew 11:27-30 “All things have been committed to me by my Father. No one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Psalm 90:1-6 A Prayer of Moses the man of God. “Lord, you have been our dwelling place throughout all generations. Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the whole world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God. You turn people back to dust, saying, “Return to dust, you mortals.” A thousand years in your sight are like a day that has just gone by, or like a watch in the night. Yet you sweep people away in the sleep of death— they are like the new grass of the morning: In the morning it springs up new, but by evening it is dry and withered.”

Reference:

Preparing for Easter ~C.S.Lewis

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Authentic. It means…
: real or genuine
: not copied or false
: true and accurate
: made to be or look just like an original

Stand out, dare to be YOU!

My goal for 2017 is to be authentic. How do I accomplish this? It requires me to start with an internal evaluation of myself and asking myself some difficult questions, such as “Am I cultivating and displaying the person I believe I am?” or “Am I too concerned with supporting others that I fail at times to promote and feed the needs of my soul?” I like things to be neat and orderly, where the pieces fall into place and forms a pretty picture. This method works mostly in the land of make-believe, movies and such. Life, as I have been told is often a bit messier and requires hard work and intentionality. I’ve been fortunate most of my life in that I have had special people come in and out of my life that have taught me many valuable lessons which I found at times easy to emulate their actions/beliefs and such. I’m being careful not to place too much judgment upon my actions, and I hope you allow yourself some grace in this manner as well. There’s a saying, ” imitation is the sincerest forms of flattery” however, it all hinges of ones perspective… this quote was made famous by Charles Caleb Colton (1780–1832) he was an English cleric, writer and collector, well-known for his eccentricities. We can choose to emulate many things done by others but in doing so are we being authentic in the process. If I feel a connection with a friend who always seems to be positive and uplifting and I want to feel the way they make me feel when I’m with them, I’d say that’s a “win-win” scenario. Let’s say there’s a person you spent time with who is always inserting their opinions in everyone’s conversations and uses foul language and makes others feel small and inferior, so they can feel superior. On the surface this could be very appealing, someone tough and has lots of people around them but followers/crowds often do not tell the whole story, followers are often there because of fear, not for friendship. We all have an internal barometer, the “gut” instinct of right and wrong inside us no matter what you call it…soul/intuition/mystical powers/God/Buddha/Allah…when we choose to listen to our inner being that is the beginning of authenticity. I have had the opportunity to meet a wide variety of individuals in my life and feel as if I’ve been given a glimpse into how others live their lives. By comparison to many I’m somewhat “sheltered” I’ve not had the pleasure of being friends with a follower of Islam, Hinduism, Taoism, Sikhism or Wiccan to name a few. I have had friends who are followers of Judaism, Christianity, Catholicism to name a few. All I’m saying is there’s more I don’t know than what I do know. With that being said, I am a Christian. I believe in Jesus Christ the Son of God and in the Holy Spirit. I have been a part of church since I was a small child, I’ve wondered away and found my way home again more than once. I want people to know the person I see when I look into a mirror. That person is broken, sinful, ashamed, flawed, proud and is made perfect through the mercy and grace of God. This is the beginning of and the unveiling of my authentic self.

“Grace is but Glory begun, and Glory is but Grace perfected.” ~Jonathan Edwards

My journey continues…stay tuned for more.

~Blessings and Peace~

“I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.” ~ Luke 5:32

“On hearing this, Jesus said to them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.” ~Mark 2:17

“But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.” ~Matthew 9:13

“Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.” ~1 Timothy 1:15

The “antidote” I use when inundated with toxic news is something relatively new for me during the past few years.  I started listening to the radio while driving my car, I had often liked driving in the quietness of the space. At first it was a lot channel surfing and then I ran across a station that resonated with my being, it was a Christian radio station and began to listen to it nearly every time I was in the car. It had what I thought was a ridiculous slogan called the “30 Day Challenge” I, of course thought it was just plain silly but I continued to listen and the songs became familiar and I found myself singing along with most of the tunes.  To clarify the “30 Day Challenge” the premise was if you allow your self 30 days to listen to nothing but Christian music you will want to listen to it all the time. So, here I am, almost 2 years later and 101.7 FM K-LOVE is programmed into my radio station favorites. Christian music is the primary music I listen to now and I have found it has an amazing calming effect in my life. I have always be drawn to music and I had used it to help deepen my moods of happiness and sadness and even despair.  The idea of using my music to change my moods from bad to better rarely ever crossed my mind because I wanted to sulk and allow my mood a fertile growth area.  I now know I have the ability to not only change the direction of my moods but now have an avenue to talk with God and ask for healing, guidance, forgiveness and grace. All of my changes are not all the direct result of the music I listen to but it has definitely help me seek alternative methods of facing toxic subjects I encounter.  Music feeds the soul, the results being positive or negative lie within our choices.  I am also a huge classic country music fan as well, music for me tells a story and my imagination gets to paint the story in my own uniqueness and I believe it can for anyone, we are only limited by ourselves.

~Blessings and Peace~

Where do you go when searching for answers? Who do you go to when searching for knowledge? I just finished watching the movie “God’s Not Dead 2” an inspiring story of strength, character, conviction and truth. Sometimes in life the answers we seek can only be discovered through self-determination and self-discovery but even with these we need a starting point, right? I don’t think I’m a lot different than most, if there’s an easy way to get an answer why not obtain it quickly and easily? I have discovered life is often easier sitting in the passenger’s seat instead of the driver’s seat. To just sit back and enjoy the ride with no decisions to be made. This is all well and good until you are going somewhere that you don’t particularly want to go, or wonder why you are going there, what then? Over time, my belief is that we can begin to loose pieces of who we are and as we conform and adapt to be like everyone else forgetting we have choices and we can put ourselves in the driver’s seat. I believe we are all born with a specific gene characteristic called “manipulation” of course, that is not the scientific terminology for it! (This is most embarrassing because I did study the general sciences while in college). Manipulation is something that does not necessary grow within us without some form of fertilization. It doesn’t mean you are weak or bad if manipulation spouts or takes root; only that someone highly skilled in it has watered it a lot! My point I want to make is this, manipulation can and will be defeated once we take hold of our own truth, our own confidence and seek truth wherever it leads us. The truth is, not everyone you meet is going to like you, and that’s ok. I used to wrestle with that statement but if we all liked the same exact things, what’s the point with life? Our existence would have little to no purpose. I believe it is because of our uniqueness and our individuality that helps to explain life. We all don’t like the same colors, seasons, foods, schools, stores, shoes, or clothing…do you see what I’m saying? I love this quote, ” In a world where you can be anybody, be yourself!” God created each of us with purpose, we were created by God for His purposes. Are you scratching you head right now, wanting the answer as to what your specific purpose is? You are not alone, I find myself asking this very question. I wish someone would just tell me the answers to my questions and I would go do that one thing!#! But it doesn’t work quite that way. It’s finding our way along the journey that leads to our purpose in fact I would be willing to say the journey is the purpose of it all. In finding our way in this world, we must see the world through the perspective of the heart and not with our eyes, as they can be deceiving. Proverbs 21:2 “A person may think their own ways are right, but the Lord weighs the heart.” When you find yourself seeking knowledge the hardest part can be starting the process. It may seem as if God is hindering our progress because the individuals we know that have knowledge do not quickly answer our direct questions. Frustrating! But, the learning is more than the answer. It involves the process of getting to the answer. Take mathematics for instance…2 + 2 = 4 was not always an easy answer, learning the alphabet or even reading, they all started with one thing and gradually added more. The Bible has some answers that seem very straight forward while others take a bit longer to find clarity. God puts special people in our lives to help us learn and grow, there are libraries and books from unimaginable points of view, and we have a vast number of bible translations and commentaries to help us navigate through to find meanings and pursue knowledge and eventually answers. The most powerful methods I have found and used are prayers, community relationships and truthful conversations about God and my personal relationship with Him. None of what I have just shared will come easily, most worthwhile things never do! Where do you go for answers? Who do you seek for answers? God, friends, family, colleagues, pastors, professors, teachers, library, internet, bookstores, YouTube, prayers…never settle and never give up, God is good, God is always good!

Numbers 6:24-26 (NIV)
“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.”

Proverbs 18:15 (NIV)
“The heart of the discerning acquires knowledge, for the ears of the wise seek it out.”

Proverbs 2:6 (NIV)
“For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding.”

Proverbs 1:7 (NIV)
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.

“Do the difficult things while they are easy and do the great things while they are small. A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.”
~Lao Tzu

“Nothing really worthwhile ever comes easy in life. You keep hitting it and going after it, and little-by-little your life becomes a masterpiece of God’s grace.”
~Rick Warren
http://pastorrick.com/devotional/english/nothing-worthwhile-ever-comes-easy

Today is my mom’s 70th birthday! She is so many things to me and touched the lives of countless others. We all have our favorite memories of laughing, crying or just having fun together. My gift this year is to celebrate life and acknowledge the greatness of my mom! She’s been living well these past few years free from pain, free from worry and stresses of everyday life. She’s experiencing the best retirement ever, you see she’s been with Jesus since 2012. I was anger for a long while because I wasn’t ready to live life without her. I didn’t feel prepared. What I’ve learned over the past few years is that she isn’t completely gone, as long as I live and breathe she is a part of me. She will always be my mother, death does not take that privilege from any of us. There’s not a single day that I do not think of her, she’s in a song I hear, I recall moments of wise words she had spoken to me, I feel her character or moral fibers woven within my humanity. She was strong, resilient, caring, determined, honest, trustworthy, gentle and stoic, some might even call her a “spitfire!” I think she would like being called that. I like to celebrate my mother and do so very often. Keeping her memory alive, allows me not to forget how she made me feel. She was my biggest fan and supporter of anything I set out to do, no matter my talent level in the pursuit. I can’t even begin to calculate the sacrifices she made for me, often I am reminded of the ugly things I said to her during the terrible teenage years of resistance and rebellion. She never wavered in her love for me, she always loved me especially when I was not deserving. There’s a part of me that will never fully understand the bond of mother to daughter, as I will never give birth to a child but from the daughter side to the mother perspective I have love in my heart that is for my mother alone, sometimes it is released in a big tear drop slowing cascading down my cheek…I resist the urge to wipe it away because I need to feel it slide down my cheek as if it’s reaching out to my mom. I catch myself smiling at times as if I’m hearing her tell me to do or not do something…wipe your feet, don’t run in the house, and anyone who knows me will recognize this one…”are you going to sleep all day?” Hahaha!

Mom, Happy Happy Birthday! Thank you for loving me and teaching me to love. ~Your Loving Daughter

Hebrews 12:11 (ESV)”For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”

Hello Friends!

It’s been a while since I have posted anything; I recently started a new project and wanted to share it with all of you. I have enrolled in a “Contemplative Photography Practice Group” with Spirituality & Practice – Resources for Spiritual Journeys. I will include the website at the bottom of the page. The group is provided a word; quote or statement and challenged to post a photo representing it. As most of you know, I thoroughly enjoy taking photos and combining it with bible verses, quotes or my own thoughts as a means to encourage and comfort myself as well as others. I hope you enjoy the first two posts I have submitted for my practice group.

Week 1: Confusion or Chaos

This photo is both confusion and chaos for me, I work in an office and this is in my view daily. This past year I learned a valuable lesson/insight from a co-worker. Basically, there are two areas in which one can choose to live: area of control or area of concern. This falls into area of concern because it concerns me and it bothers me; however, it is not an area of control because I share an office with 12 other individuals and it neither bothers nor is noticed by most. I could try to make it a control issue but in the end, I would be frustrated daily because the only control I truly have is my own ability to let it go. I can take control of my workspace while on duty but I must let it go until I return and start fresh every new day. My stress level is low and I no longer feel like it is my responsibility to keep all things neat and orderly, Just Breathe!

Week 2: Quote “In that tiny space between all the givens is freedom.” By Sue Bender.

I love this picture, I’ve had people laugh at it, show surprise at it and some failed to see from my perspective. I came across this item while doing laundry recently, my immediate thought was “God” and my second thought was my mother, who has passed away. This something was nothing more than a “dust/lint” ball from the dryer. It is hanging on the underneath of my shelf. I saw an “Angel” God speaking to me and I also laughed while thinking of my mom…this would not be something found in her laundry room. And perhaps that is the message; with all the “givens” I have the freedom to be “Me!” “In that tiny space between all the givens is freedom.” ~Sue Bender

~Blessings and Peace~

Reference:
http://www.spiritualityandpractice.com

 

At dinner tonight I had a thought enter my mind, it was the word “freedom” and it was immediately followed by a sensation of “responsibility.” First and foremost, I know that God opened my thoughts to these two words and I believe I’m supposed to share them with you. Initially, I merely thought of my own experiences and the funny thing is I was just sharing my thoughts with a friend just a few days ago about knowing individuals who believe they are “owed” free stuff and yet take no active role in their own lives to figure out how to help themselves move past “free” so that others in need can do the same. These individuals refuse to see their role of responsibility. Curious as to whether this was just my own mind acting out as judge and jury I did what I often try to do, research…so I went straight to “Google!” I found an article that seemed to make a lot of sense. I am not going to provide the website, and if what I am sharing causes you to question “you” must start you own journey, it would be irresponsible of me to limit you to my limited experiences.

Seek and you will find, says the great teacher in Jeremiah 29:13 “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”

Freedom means you will have to be responsible for every act, for every breath; whatever you do or don’t do, you will be responsible.

People are really in deep fear of freedom, although they talk about freedom. But my own experience is: very few people really want freedom ; because they are subconsciously aware that freedom will bring many problems that they are not ready to face. It is better to remain in cozy imprisonment. It is warmer, and what will you do with freedom? Unless you are ready to be a seeker, a searcher, a visionary… Very few people want to go on a journey into the deep silences of their heart, or to take responsibility. The implications are great. I say, your reward will be great when you give yourself permission to seek.

Deuteronomy 4:29 ESV
“But from there you will seek the Lord your God and you will find him, if you search after him with all your heart and with all your soul.”

 

Jeremiah 29:12-14 ESV
“Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the Lord, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, declares the Lord, and I will bring you back to the place from which I sent you into exile.”

Matthew 7:7-8 ESV
“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened.”

1 Chronicles 16:11 ESV
“Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!”

Lamentations 3:25 ESV
“The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him.”

Isaiah 55:6-7 ESV
“Seek the Lord while he may be found; call upon him while he is near; let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; let him return to the Lord, that he may have compassion on him, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.”

Psalm 119:10 ESV
“With my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments!”

~Blessings and Peace~

As I am writing this my heart is heavy, today I will be attending a funeral, a life celebration for a second cousin of mine. He is my mom’s first cousin and they had a lot in common. Family was precious to both of them, they loved to laugh and reminisce whenever they were together. They both came from families with lots of love, history and traditions. Today, also marks four years since my mother passed away, I still think of her everyday and I miss her and I’m ok with all of it. Grief has found a place to rest in my soul. I was talking to a friend today, describing how my thoughts of heaven have changed through the years…I believe it’s an evolving idea. As a kid, I heard about streets made of gold, mansions, praising and singing, harps playing and big white fluffy clouds. As I have grown and experienced life and studied the bible I think maybe, all the things I mentioned are true and more…my hope is that God and the spirits/souls of family members met my cousin and my mom as they entered into God’s Kingdom. I’m comforted by knowing that I was raised in a Christian home with the promise of everlasting life with our Creator. I hope these words below and the songs give you peace and comfort.

To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.

~C. S. Lewis

Family, the fragile state of life.
The tests and trials before us
Years come and go, family ties bind
Sickness and sadness reminds us
Busy lives, racing to and fro
Thinking tomorrow time will slow
Tomorrows stay elusive out of reach
We gather at weddings, wishing
We gather at funerals, remembering
Often asking why and where
God may seem elusive but He’s not
God is always with us
We only notice when we need Him
Celebrate the daily things
Thank God daily for His presence
Take time for Family in-the-in-between
Weddings will be happier
Funerals will be less sad
Family ties that bind, strengthened
The grace of God never-ending.

~April 3, 2011
4:44pm

The Day

The day I never wanted to come
That day has come and gone
The imagined loss and emptiness
Those feelings have settled in
A void that cannot be filled
How does one grieve such a loss
Not with time, family or friends
Such a loss with open wounds
Wounds that are felt more than seen
Pain that blocks all healing
Mourning that feels no relief
Just one more hug or embrace
One more I love you
No one can ease the pains of life
Nothing like a mothers love
Mom, I miss you
I miss you everyday.

~July 28, 2012
10:26pm
Mom…
I took for granted that you would always be there for me, how selfish that was but here I am wishing you were here with me. I’m sitting here thinking of all the missed opportunities I had and let slip away because I thought…there’s always next week or tomorrow now there’s no more tomorrow’s or next week. I miss you so much it literally makes me weak and ill. Thinking of all the things we wanted to do and now they will never be realized because you’re gone. You were the strongest person I knew, the most giving person I knew and you were loved by so many, even by the ones who didn’t like you they loved the person you were. I like to think of you in place where you can still see me and watching over me. I also hope you’re at rest and surrounded by loved ones and you have peace. If I close me eyes I can still feel the embrace of our final hug and kiss goodbye ….that day will always be…no, it does feel like its happening right in this very moment. It’s true what they say…When you need me but do not want me, then I must stay. When you want me but no longer need me, then I have to go. Mom, I miss you so very, very much!
I will forever be your loving daughter.

~January 08, 2013
8:08pm

~Blessings and Peace~
“Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” ~John 14:27