Dreams, we all have them, some we remember and others quickly fade. Dreams can be happy, sad, scary, and odd to list a few. The dictionary offers the follow:

Dream
noun, often attributive\ˈdrēm\
often attributive
1: a series of thoughts, images, or emotions occurring during sleep had a dream about climbing a mountain gives me bad dreams — compare rem sleep
2: an experience of waking life having the characteristics of a dream: such as
a : a visionary creation of the imagination :daydream the dreams of her youth
b : a state of mind marked by abstraction or release from reality : reverie walking around in a dream
c : an object seen in a dreamlike state : vision a man that was her dream come true
3: something notable for its beauty, excellence, or enjoyable quality the new car is a dream to operate
4a : a strongly desired goal or purpose a dream of becoming president
b : something that fully satisfies a wish : ideal a meal that was a gourmet’s dream

I am not expert on dreaming nor do I have any answers for why we dream or anything else about dreams. I had a dream and I am writing about it and wanted to share it. It was only a dream and it could be my unconscious shedding some light on an area I have been avoiding, it might be something I should pursue or at least be open to. Whatever the reason, waking up feeling loved is always a good thing in my book. Perhaps my mind is just reminding me that I am loved and I do try to love others. Isn’t that what this life is really about (?) LOVING AND BEING LOVED. God tells us over and over in the Bible that we are loved and that we are to love others!

“We love because he first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.” ~1 John 4:19-21https://www.biblegateway.com/passage?search=1%20John%204:19-21&version=NIV

“One of them, an expert in the law, tested him with this question: “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” ~Matthew 22:35-40https://www.biblegateway.com/passage?search=Matthew%2022:35-40&version=NIV

*“The question of whether dreams actually have a physiological, biological or psychological function has yet to be answered.”

*“There are several theories as to why we dream. One is that dreams work hand in hand with sleep to help the brain sort through everything it collects during the waking hours.”

*“During sleep, the brain works to plow through all of this information to decide what to hang on to and what to forget. Some researchers feel like dreams play a role in this process.”

*Excerpt from:

https://science.howstuffworks.com/life/inside-the-mind/human-brain/why-do-we-dream.htm

This was my dream:
I dreamed about you last night, you were as real as the sun and the moon and just beyond my reach. Through all that distance I could feel the essence of your soul, I felt your confidence and your compassion, a welcoming smile for a tired and seeking soul. I was overcome with a warmth that engulfed me and gravity seemed to be more of a choice rather than a reality. I know somehow we are destined to meet; I am meant to love you and more importantly you are meant to love me. My heart is filled to epic proportions and as the day breaks into my consciousness and tries to awaken me from my slumber, all I want to do is fall back into the free feeling of you, my dream and I am content to breathe you in and to marvel at your presence. The waking hours eventually win out and as my day continues I am battling with my mind to keep the thoughts of you alive and to not have you fade into the familiar, a hazy memory. I want to remember, I want to relive the feelings and to recall everything about you from your hair blowing in the breeze, to your eyes that seem to penetrate my guarded soul. As I am preparing for sleep once again, I am wishing and hoping we will meet again very soon. Until that day comes, when we are face to face, I will look for you in my dreams. ~Good Night-Sweet Dreams~

I was searching for a song and video to share with you that somehow expressed my thoughts and God lead me to this one. It speaks volumes about what “we” allow the world to tell us about ourselves, all the lies and doubts. This blog started out as something very different from what I usually write about but I had an urgency on my heart to share it. At first I thought it was my dream that I needed to share and perhaps it is to some degree. Dreams are a lot like goals, we can see where we want to be but we have a lot of distance to cover to get there. This video reminded me that our dreams can become reality when we seek God first and ask for His guidance and blessings. My dream made me feel wanted and loved, the reality of that is this…I AM LOVED! God has blessed me far beyond my imagination. I am so thankful for everything God as provided. I’m not giving up on my dream just trusting in God’s plan and I know this for sure, sleeping and chasing dreams in my sleep will not magically make dreams come true. My prayer is that God blesses you in a special and unique way today!

~Blessings and Peace~

http://bravegirlsclub.com/

http://bravegirlsclub.com/archives/34338

I just had to share the latest post from Brave Girls Club.  God is GOOD, GOD IS ALWAYS GOOD!  I had just posted my most recent blog and I decided to check my email and the latest post from BGC had been delivered, as I began to read it my heart was overwhelmed at God’s timing.  I’m thankful for this wonderful website and if you haven’t heard of it or read any of their posts I recommend giving it a try.  I was introduced to it by a very dear and trusted friend and I am grateful every single time I read it and it seems to be written especially for just me!  I am simply posting and promoting their site:

http://bravegirlsclub.com/archives/34338

~Blessings and Peace~

Today I decided to tackle a project that I have been postponing for far longer than I want to admit. Things were going very well, a stack of trash, a stack of shred and then the unexpected. Things that I had just pushed aside and stacked away, choosing avoidance of things…old birthday cards, photos of friends and family that have passed away, letters and notes from friends and ex-lovers. I paused for a moment, then I began reading the cards, notes and letters…talk about an emotional overload! So, I did what comes naturally…do something else, anything, so I laid the items down and walked away from them. I decided that I needed to allow myself the time and space to view this situation for what it is and not what it was. I have wonderful memories of all these people, places and things and in my memories is where they will serve me best. I know and I have experienced the devastation of wanting to go back in time, to ask the questions of why and why not and I can tell you that these thoughts ultimately will lead to dark and murky thoughts and will only serve to cause more pain. I was recently ask, if I could go back in time and change something, what would it be? My most truthful answer was “nothing.” I am seeking to fully accept that I am the person I am today in spite and because of all my yesterdays. I’ve gained a lot of patience and humility over the past few years and the most important lesson I’ve learned is that things rarely go according to the plan. Time is a variable that tics away and is never measured exactly the same way from person to person and/or from situation to situation. Life’s lesson, I have found to be more like an outline for rules instead of play by-play rules.  Grief is a good example, everyone will experience grief at some point in life; the stages of grief are the same for everyone but not everyone experiences them in the same order or in the same time frame but make no mistake each stage will be experienced.  Additionally, grief comes in all shapes and sizes; plus depending upon everything else happening in and around you at the moment grief pays a visit, no two people respond to it in the same manner. It was important to me to share this grief information because my “emotional cleaning” has everything to do with grief and I have decided I no longer want to be emotionally chained to the grief of what was and no longer is. My mom passed away over 5 years ago, I think about her everyday, not on purpose and yet I’m thankful for the moments of joy my memories provide. I miss her and I have gained more than I lost when she died. I am stronger because I more fully understand her strength and resolve for life; I display more patience than I ever could have hoped for because she was steadfast and committed to her family and friends; I am more confident and courageous because all these things remain true about who my mother was and continues to be. My mom lives on within my heart and soul. I also experienced a relationship break-up over 9 years ago, I mention this for two reasons, the first being it had been a long relationship and secondly because I’ve recently started seeing life in the “present” the here and now, which has helped to pave the way for me to do some “Emotional Cleaning.” As I was going through the old cards and letters, I found myself being drawn back in time, reading the words as if for the first time. Then, my mind quickly adjusts to the present and I felt betrayed by the words I was reading,  I took a deep breath and put the cards and letters aside. Then it hit me!!! I’ve been missing the point and searching for answers that do not exist. The words weren’t betraying me or what was, the words were absolutely true, when they were written. I’ve been wanting to find blame, find the cause and why things happened the way they did.  I am now choosing to see things as they are, people change and things change, there’s a reason for all things the Bible tells us, although the reason may not be clear for a while.  Over time people change, sometimes going in the same direction and others times in the opposite direction; change is inevitable.  In this situation, grief has taught me that life is a forward movement for everyone but often our destinations vary. I am no longer going to allow time to taint my memories, I’m not happy with a lot of my life choices and I’m not going to be defined by my mistakes.  I am choosing to learn from my them and to make better choices. Grief is not about being sad, it teaches us about ourselves and our capabilities. I have many people to thank for being helping me be able to see life so differently than I did a decade or so ago.  I can’t mention them all by name because I have no doubt, I would inevitably forget someone. I do want to personally recognize thank two mental health experts for their time and support; a member of the clergy and a trusted friend who taught me humility and trust through their actions, not through words and lastly a coworker whose constant support and moral fiber challenge me to be a better person today than I was yesterday.  None of this would be possible without the love of Jesus Christ! God has never wavered in His love for me and I promise you, He loves you just as much! I pray that you already know Him in a personal way, as your Lord and Savior. If you don’t, please accept this invitation to accept Him today, right now. All you need to do is believe in God and ask Him to be your Lord. Amen.

Life is tough sometimes but it is so worth it when we rely on God to lead us.

Ecclesiastes 3:1.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens;”

Proverbs 3:5
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;”

The Five Stages of Grief
Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance
“These are the framework that makes up our learning to live with loss. They are tools to help us frame and identify what we may be feeling. But they are not stops on some linear timeline in grief. Not everyone goes through all of them or in a prescribed order…remember your grief is as unique as you are.” ~David Kessler (GRIEF.COM) BECAUSE LOVE NEVER DIES
https://grief.com/the-five-stages-of-grief/

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.” ~John 1:1

“My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.” ~Psalm 121

~Blessings and Peace~

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.”
~Ecclesiastes 3:1

“To focus solely on endings is to trade conclusions for the very beginnings that created them. And if this cycle should persist, we will likewise miss the beginning that will follow this ending.”
~Craig D. Lounsbrough

The Cycle of Life, what is it and do I really have to participate. (?).  I recently had the opportunity to share some of my thoughts as they related to the passing of my mom in 2012. Back then I thought I had the whole cycle of life, the part about being born and the dying figured out but I was absolutely not prepared nor did I understand the reality of it all, losing my mom was a BIG deal. My thoughts have been filled with memories of my mom for many reasons lately and my hope is someone will benefit from what I am sharing. My mom was only 65 when we suddenly lost her. My last memory of her is saying goodbye and hugging her as she and my family left my home to drive an hour to their home. It was a Wednesday afternoon and I got the call at 3:22am on that Friday saying she had passed. It was very surreal, life seemed to be in slow motion for several hours, even days that followed. My dad and my brother were present at her passing and their last memories of her are quite different from mine. It would be 3 more days before I could say goodbye at the funeral. I frequently visit her gravesite and tell her that I love her and that I miss her. Over time I’ve cone to embrace and live into the sadness and moved towards acceptance. I know the grave only holds the body and that her spirit is with God; however, it feels intimate and peaceful when I visit her there. It is so true what the professions say about the stages of grief; one must live into them, let the emotions take root and wrestle with them. In time you will be glad you did. Grief is not something that goes away but you can learn to accept it and live into the emotions that surface.

The 5 Stages of Grief:
Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance
These are all part of the framework that makes up our learning to live with the one we lost. They are tools to help us frame and identify what we may be feeling. But they are not stops on some linear timeline in grief.

So, here I am in 2017…I absolutely still miss my mom and some of the best and most difficult lessons in life have happened during these past 5 years. I believe in the divine power of God and just as the verse I posted at the beginning of this post says, “There’s a time for everything…” I’ve grown and matured beyond my own expectations as I have traversed through life without my mom. It was through her absence that I was able to see the miraculous woman that she was. I’ll never forgot the words that her boss said at her memorial service, “Not everyone liked Shirley, but everyone respected her.”  Wow!  I was blessed to have her as my mom. I am equally blessed to have a loving and caring dad and brother, our relationships have grown as we have lived into our grief and knowing that life doesn’t stop just because we want it to. My mom’s birthday is this Saturday, the 23rd, she would have been 71. I’ll be having good thoughts of her on that day.

Today, as I was driving and doing errands I received an unexpected call from my brother, he wanted to share his delight in becoming a grandpa this week on the 18th! And that makes me a Great-Aunt, Woo Hoo! His voice was pure delight to my ears, he’s already planning fishing trips with his grandson. Better yet, my dad is a great-grand-dad, how awesome it that! There were a few tears in our conversation wishing mom could share in this beautiful new life that has been a blessed gift and has tightened the family fibers that had worn thin through the years. God is doing amazing things within our family and I am in AWE! There’s renewed family ties, siblings and step-parents, grand-parents, it’s all simply beautiful. All this because of a baby boy! God is good, GOD IS ALWAYS GOOD! The only wish my mom ever really wanted was for her family and her children to be happy. She had generous heart and soul, she was honest, ethical and above all she was authentic. I reminded my brother of these truths and told him she would be extremely happy and proud of him and all of our family.
~Blessings and Peace~

 

 

 

Recently, I had a conversation about “JOY” and I imagined a completely different view of joy based upon biblical statements that seem to be in direct opposition of what I learned as a child in Sunday school. Did any of you remember learning what the acronym J O Y meant?

J=Jesus (1st)
O=Others (2nd)
Y=Yourself (Last)

By definition the word ” JOY” describes an emotion of well-being or good fortune; the expression of an emotion; a state of happiness; or a cause of delight. Depending on your religious views or beliefs it nay evoke thoughts of Christmas songs and celebrations. The vertical acronym J O Y was explained to me as a child in Sunday School. My all-time favorite teacher Roberta “Birdie.” J=Jesus; O=Others; Y=Yourself. The fundamental principle was to teach us to recognize that Jesus/God created us and we were created to serve Him; secondly, we should carefully consider “Others” before ourselves, as to not be prideful and to be respectful of all “others; and lastly, only after we have shown care, love and respect to “Jesus” and “Others,” then we could care, love and have respect for ourselves. As it was taught using a vertical structure to emphasize the hierarchy.
J=Jesus
O=Others
Y=Yourself

What if,…we allow ourselves to look at J O Y from horizontal view(?).

Jesus, Others, and Yourself

Does it change how we treat others and the order in which we do? I believe the answer is yes. I definitely don’t believe my Sunday school teacher intentionally taught me to think less of myself by being last on the list, instead it was presented as a guide to take others into consideration and think about how we treat others and it was a great way to teach the basic teachings of the bible.

So looking at J O Y horizontally it takes away the sense that others are more worthy than ourselves, the New Testament specifically tells us that we are to love your neighbor as yourself. Jesus uses the word “as”  NOT “before or first.” Jesus loves all people, just as Jesus died for all sinners and He has redeemed all sin. There’s not big sin and little sin, it’s all sin. God’s Love is love enough for all. In fact, Jesus left Heaven to be born human and lived among us, teaching and loving everyone. So, if we tilt our heads and see J O Y horizontally there is overwhelming love/joy for everyone.

Mark 12:28-31 “One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?” “The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”
~Blessings and Peace~

Are you living or existing? Are you working to make a living? Are you existing to live? Are you living to exist?

Odd questions with perplexing answers. Most of us would agree that we work so that we can live the life we choose. We work so we can enjoy the fruits of our labor, whatever they might be. We also work to provide a constant income for food, shelter, transportation and other life essentials.

A deeper question might be, why this job? How did I get here and do I even like it? Job by mere definition is (1) the work that a person does regularly in order to earn money; (2) a duty, task, or function that someone or something has; (3) something that requires very great effort. The first thing that pops out me to is that there is no mention of someone’s like or dislike to perform a job. Data does show that people performing jobs they like are more apt to perform at higher levels; however, that is not the only motivating factor. Reasons why individuals work jobs and stay for periods of time vary greatly depending on their specific needs at the time. I can only offer my own experiences as evidence regarding the subject matter of existing or living, my hope is to provide a small piece of insight to someone who might be asking the question.

I have spent four decades working a variety of jobs, it has at times been educational, humiliating, rewarding, painful, and repetitive along the way. Each job prepared me for the next, though I did not realize that at the time. Sometimes when we are young we have a clear picture in our minds of what we want to do with our lives, the exact profession we want to pursue and sometimes it’s a work in progress. There’s no right answers but more importantly there’s no wrong answers. It’s all part of the learning process. I’m reminded of my senior year in college, my last hurdle before graduation was to complete my student teaching in order to receive my teaching credentials. I was terrified, I didn’t think I could do it. Facing middle school kids and high school students in the gymnasium…I thought I would literally die! I was blessed with wonderful students and extremely patient and caring mentors that helped me succeed. One thing that I can say now and believe with every part of my being is this…Life is hard! Not impossible! But hard. As I look back on the jobs I have done I can honestly say I’ve learned so much more than the skills to do them, I’ve learned about myself and that’s the best part. My career choice looks vastly different from its humble beginning and I couldn’t be happier about that. My teaching degree has helped me in ways I never imagined possible and my career path is filled with detours, stops and starts and I am so grateful for all of it. Looking back I can see that I existed and more importantly I can see I lived. I recently heard someone say, “you can’t live in the past.” True enough, the same is true about the future. We only have today, yesterday is a memory and tomorrow a dream, always a day away. Don’t settle for either living or existing, you can have both by living in the present…

When we shed the pretenses of who we are and what others expect from us we are the truest form of ourselves. Life is hard and life is short, be the best you, you can be. Happiness comes from within, no one can give it to you and you do not have the power to make someone else happy. Do yourself a favor today, choose happiness for yourself.

My prayer is that you know you are alive and worthy of love and happiness. As I said no one can give you happiness, I know someone who can give you more than happiness, Jesus can give you life eternal. Jesus loves you! Amen.
“If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved.“Romans 10:9-10

Ulysses
“…It may be that the gulfs will wash us down:
It may be we shall touch the Happy Isles,
And see the great Achilles, whom we knew.
Tho’ much is taken, much abides; and tho’
We are not now that strength which in old days
Moved earth and heaven, that which we are, we are;
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.
~By Alfred Lord Tennyson

~Blessings and Peace~

Psalm 139:13-16 “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”

Fifty-three years and nine months ago today, I was being created. I wish my mom were here to celebrate with me, she’s been gone five years, one month and thirty-eight days…I miss her laugh, the most. Today, I will be attending my moms family reunion, “The Sanders Family Reunion” at Turkey Run State Park. I am looking forward to seeing aunts and uncles, first cousins, second cousins…etc. We will reminisce about those who are no longer with us, but celebrate their spirit that lives on within our hearts. I will be missing my moms homemade macaroni salad, homemade mac & cheese, and homemade chocolate sheet cake! Then, there’s grandmas homemade chicken & noodles and mashed potatoes…I think I’ve gained weight just thinking about all these wonderful treats from the past. These are my memories and I will always cherish them but there’s room for new favorites prepared by the next generation of “Sanders” and we will create new memories today. I am reminded of a wonderful movie I saw called “The Book of Life” although the movie is about Día de los Muertos (Day of the Dead), a holiday that celebrates those who have passed, its message can be celebrated anytime because when we remember those we love that have passed, they remain alive in our hearts. Life is short even for those who live to be in their eighties or nineties, and beyond, embrace life, share love and kindness and you will always be remembered by those who knew you. Time flies, I am fifty-three…(long sigh…) I do not know what I’m supposed to be feeling, I look in the mirror and it’s the same face I’ve been looking at for as long as I can remember. Sure, there’s wrinkles and lines, gray hair shining through and my body is bit more stiff than I choose to admit, but I feel that time has passed too quickly. Time is still measured at twenty-four hours in a day, how is it that my mind has trouble with that knowledge because I remember things so vividly like they just happened the other day.  Such as my sixteenth birthday, I really wanted a cake with yellow roses on it, my mom made it happen, I got a cake with yellow roses! HaHa! I remember wanted to be a professional softball player when I was in high school, before that was even a thing. Graduating from high school and being the first in my family to go away to college, what an adventure that was. My first job after college was coaching and teaching, the money was not great in fact it wasn’t even good money but the memories were and are priceless. I’ve experienced life in many different ways and I’ve experienced good things and bad, all have helped to mold me into the person I am today. I come from along list of strong and confident women, “Sanders” women! This day may be my birthday but it’s so much more than just about me, if it weren’t for my mom and the lessons she learned from her mom, and so on, back in time, I would not be the person I am today. I am proud to be the daughter of Shirley (Peach) Lee Sanders Robinson and the granddaughter of Betty Jo Corey Sanders Nelson. I am blessed.

“The world keeps spinning, and the tales keep turning, and people come and people go, but they’re never forgotten. And the one truth we know, it held true one more time… That love, true love, the really, really good kind of love never dies.” ~”The Book of Life” movie quote.

“All of these families have lost someone, but as long as we remember them, we can feel their presence with us for one night each year.” ~”The Book of Life” movie quote.

~Blessings and Peace~

She greets life daily with a smile and friendly gestures. To assume she’s faking would be a dire mistake. She loves to meet people and share in their day, it’s like oxygen to her lungs. She is generous and kind, energized by the diversity of people who bring sunshine into her life. She sees herself quite simple and extremely blessed. She knows that she has way more than most people dream of having, she is conscientious of her privilege and does not think herself better than others. She is curious about life and the meaning of it all. She strives to understand the universe and it’s vastness. She has faith in God, the Creator of Heaven and earth. She seeks to live into the purpose of her life that was prepared and planned by God, Himself. This seems as good a place as any to pause and ask the question, “troubled, tortured soul?” She confides in only a few, as if it’s a deadly devastating thing to be “troubled and tortured” her words not mine, and I am cautious to not question and be supportive. She wants to be, to do, she sees value in others so easily and when she looks at her own reflection, misses the beauty that others notice straight away. I failed to mention that she is smart and articulate, competitive and gracious, funny and light-hearted. On the surface she is brave and confident, just beneath the surface self-doubt starts sniffing about to find remnants of faults and fears from long ago. She keeps these at bay because she’s learned the craftiness of their ways over the years and most days she knocks the wind from their soaring sails and sends them to lonely shores filled with the wreckage of ships on a collision course of defeat. She sees the glass half full sometimes and half empty at other times. The timing of life’s experiences changes which she sees first which guides her decisions. If she were to seek advice from me, I would say to her…it matters not which comes first, half full or half empty, it only matters the path you choose to take once all the facts are known. There’s no such thing as a “perfect” life. If not for doubts and defeats, we would not know the sensation of courage and victory. I would also share this with her, treat yourself with the same respect that you so freely give to others. A troubled and tortured soul perhaps, but the joys of knowing the opposite is the reward in itself!  “A life that is planned is a closed life, my friend. It can be endured but it cannot be lived.” ~
The Inn of the Sixth Happiness, 1958

~Blessings and Peace~



It starts with one person. Sharing your story with a single person will reach more people than you can ever imagine. Sharing the Good News of Jesus starts precisely at the place you are at, at this very moment. God uses us in every moment and situation we are in to bring the Word of God to others. In fact, you are able to reach others without ever speaking a word, it’s true! A simple act of bowing your head before eating a meal, closing your eyes prior to (whatever you are doing) shooting a basketball, stepping into the batters box, kicking a football, walking onto a stage, driving a car, flying a plane, or driving a school bus and more. God can use each of us, using the smallest parts of ourselves to bring about great changes in the world, He ask only that we are faithful and to take the first step of faith. I made the biggest and best decision of my life, not simply from hearing a minister preach a sermon or a church building or congregation, not from someone quoting me scripture, no it was through the observation and inclusion into a family of a high school friend. They loved me and included me as if I was an extension of their family. I saw LOVE and more importantly I felt LOVED and I learned that God was the source of it all. I wanted to have what they had, it was hard to describe and harder yet to ask for. It wasn’t a thing, it was more a feeling. I now know it was a yearning to trust and believe in God, I was seeking a personal relationship with God. I was able to see God through their relationships with one another and by how they treated others. I learned early on that God was not about perfection, harmony, trendy homes, cars, or fashion…it was how you treat people. On September 6th, 1979 I had a conversation with my mom about God and she called the Pastor from the Christian School my brother and I attended and at 10:10pm that night I ask Jesus to save me and forgive my sins, to be my Lord and Savior. Since that time I have learned and grown in my faith and I still seek to be the whole person God created me to be. To date, the most valuable lesson I’ve learned about life is this…no two are alike. God created each person with and for a purpose. Our growth charts and levels of achievements are not for comparing ourselves with one another, we are to challenge ourselves daily to be more Christlike than we were the day before. We can’t change yesterday and tomorrow will always be a day away. Live today with all your being. There have been times in my life when I’ve told myself that I’m not good enough, I should have learned that lesson long ago, I should have known better the second time, I…I…I!!! It wasn’t until I allowed myself some grace and forgiveness, the things that I freely give to everyone else in my life, did I truly recognize that I’m O.K., so what if I had relationships not work out, so what if I didn’t get my Masters before I was 35, and all the other lists of things I had placed as a threshold upon myself, God had not made those demands, I did. God loves me with or without my list of “do’s!” I am more fully aware of how to be a better partner in a relationship now, because I know what doesn’t work for me and what does. I have learned the value of having a job I love because of my experiences at jobs I’ve had, jobs I’ve quit, and even jobs I was asked to leave. If I had never experienced those situations I would not know what truly makes me want to go to work every day, it’s more than a means to an end, its joys and challenges, it’s a privilege and an honor and it’s relationships with people. It’s our experiences, good and bad that help us know ourselves and learn life’s lessons that can’t simply be learned from reading a book or even by watching someone else. Embrace your experiences, hold onto your truths and set everything else free. Free yourself of the burdens of carrying regrets, mistakes, and pain, learn from them and then LET THEM GO! I like the person I am, I think today was the first day I’ve said that out loud to myself and believe it with all my being. I said to a friend today, “I’m not here for the taking, for people to pick and choose what they want, I can make choices for myself.” All of this is about relationships with ourselves, with our friends, family, coworkers, the world and most importantly our relationship with God. Reaching the multitudes sounds so overwhelming but trust me it’s not, being true to yourself, being responsible and respecting others can spread more good and positivity than any words could ever hope to. You can change a person’s whole outlook on themselves and life in general simply by smiling and making eye contact, holding a door for someone, saying “thank you” or ” you’re welcome.” Invest in yourself, then share the profits of that with the world.
~Blessings and Peace~
“Then Moses said to the Lord, “Please, Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither recently nor in time past, nor since You have spoken to Your servant; for I am slow of speech and slow of tongue.” The Lord said to him, “Who has made man’s mouth? Or who makes him mute or deaf, or seeing or blind? Is it not I, the Lord?” ~Exodus 4:10-11
“They said, “Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved…” ~Acts 16:31
“…that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved;” ~Romans 10:9

“What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?”
~Mark 8:36

Where to begin? We all have stories and struggles as well as triumphs and they are all uniquely our own. Our experiences can be similar but make no mistake no two are exactly the same. Don’t get me wrong we can be empathetic with one another because our emotions have a common denominator, we are human beings created by God and with purpose. Even those individuals that we do not feel or experience a commonality with, we can and should be sympathetic towards their struggles. I am finding that there are so many struggles around me and even if I choose to dismiss them, that does not make them go away. I am learning that I have the power to choose, choose to not get so tied up in knots over things that are out of my control. I may have concerns and even then I can choose whether or not those concerns control me or guide me. Complaining, ranting and raving serves no purpose except to keep me miserable and fighting a battle that I sincerely have no claims to except my personal opinions. If a particular issues bothers me to the point of controlling me and/or separates me from others serves no one. Passions and convictions absolutely have a place in our society and our world and respect should be absolutes, acceptance is not a guaranteed; however, it is fabulously appreciated when extended. There is space for agreeing to disagree and there’s even more room for compromises. Democracy and diplomacy. My fears are that we have not and are not learning from history and the lessons and of horrific outcomes of actions and inactions. I often find it relatively easy to imagine myself in someone else’s place or situation but to actually be their specific circumstances, this serves to me more of a challenge. Why you might be asking…my reactions or recourse is drawn from my own experiences, and although they are and can be similar they are not an exact duplicate of emotions and in some cases are not even comparable to the other persons experiences. We have all said to someone, “I know exactly what you mean!” we probably did it today! I don’t say this pointing fingers, we are all human and we are all predisposed with at least one trait, selfishness. Some people handle this better than others and some feed on it more than others. At times, it seems we have a tendency to see the world and the people around us through our own limited narrow view, as limiting as a child’s viewfinder. We are constantly looking at the same images and are conditioned to see “our truth” and that can be as misguided as fools gold. It’s shiny and gold but holds no value. I once had someone very dear to me tell me that just because someone tells you something is true, does not make it so. The lesson I learned was that we must find some truths on our own and not just take someone else’s words for it. Another great lesson I learned was from a coach while I was as in college and that is this, “practice does not make one perfect.” “Only perfect practice makes one perfect.” If you practiced shooting free throws in front of the designed line and make all the baskets but in the game when you must stand behind the line and always miss, what have you gained? The best lesson learned here is this; there are always rules that must be followed. The reality that I am mind-fully trying to grasp is that not everyone is going to like me, not everyone is going to share my beliefs, not everyone is going to share my political views, not everyone is going to share my economic opinions…and it’s ok. I have several people in my life that I want to like me, respect me and appreciate me but there’s only one that is most valuable. God because all that I am is because of Him, I am not worthy of anything but Jesus loved me so much He died for me. Perspective note to self…this world is temporary, my permanent home is in Heaven with God the Father, Jesus Christ the Son and the Holy Spirit.
~Blessings and Peace~

Mindful quotes:
“If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all.” ~These words have also been credited to Alice Roosevelt Longworth who was the daughter of President Teddy Roosevelt and a long-time Washington socialite known for adroit remarks.