The book reference for today’s devotional was “A Grief Observed” by C.S.Lewis. I had no idea that this would be the reference point when I wrote my blog entry yesterday, all I can say is “God is good, God is always good!” Amen! I remember a time or a few times to be more accurate in my life when I thought I would never again feel happiness or joy, grief can be a heavy burden to carry and to carry alone. Do you know what I have discovered? Not only did I survive those terrible situations I am a better person because of them…wow! Because of loss in my life, I now have insight from personal experiences to be more empathetic to others, I can take better care of myself. I have gained knowledge in areas I didn’t think I needed any help with and I found that I carry around a lot of “stuff” I was never meant to carry. God is working in amazing ways and teaching me things I never knew I needed to know. I’m living into His purposes and plans for my life, I don’t fully understand everything but I’m trusting God. Can I pray for you today? God of heaven and earth, Lord of the universe open the hearts and minds of all who are seeking to know you. Use these words and your scriptures to open the minds and hearts of your children. I ask that you bless and keep everyone that calls upon your name. May all these things be for your glory. Amen!

Quotes from “A Grief Observed”
“For in grief nothing “stays put.” One keeps on emerging from a phase, but it always recurs. Round and round. Everything repeats. Am I going in circles, or dare I hope I am on a spiral?”

“But if a spiral, am I going up or down it?
How often — will it be for always? — how often will the vast emptiness astonish me like a complete novelty and make me say, “I never realized my loss till this moment”? The same leg is cut off time after time.”

“This is one of the miracles of love: It gives a power of seeing through its own enchantments and yet not being disenchanted.”

Matthew 11:25-30 “At that time Jesus said, “I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this is what you were pleased to do. “All things have been committed to me by my Father. No one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Psalm 68:17-21 “The chariots of God are tens of thousands and thousands of thousands; the Lord has come from Sinai into his sanctuary. When you ascended on high, you took many captives; you received gifts from people, even from the rebellious— that you, Lord God, might dwell there. Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens. Our God is a God who saves; from the Sovereign Lord comes escape from death. Surely God will crush the heads of his enemies, the hairy crowns of those who go on in their sins.”

~Blessings and Peace~

I have found a companion in C.S.Lewis, his writings seem to touch the deepest parts of my soul. Below I have shared two quotes from two separate books he wrote on the subject of death. It wasn’t until I began thinking about this particular devotional that the striking differences of the two are that one describes and explains death in a matter of fact way almost like a definition or outline, cold. In the second book Lewis is more animated and shares emotions rather than the sterile and stale facts about death and its impact on self and others, more introspective. The change in tone and presentation of the two books is that when he wrote “A Grief Observed,” he was reeling from the death of his beloved wife, he shared his grief with his readers and the world. I have no doubt this was both painful and therapeutic, it is because of his writings and supportive people in my life I am able to share my grief. I had experienced loss in my life but when my mother passed away, it was as if time stopped. It was true but I didn’t want to believe it. Sometimes we have to not merely read about something for it to be true, some of us also need to experience it. My encounters with death prior to my mom had been in the matter of fact category much like Lewis’s first book “The Problem of Pain.” After the passing of my mom, I looked at death differently, you may find this difficult to believe or grasp but I’m grateful that I’m not over her death, grief has a beautiful way of helping one heal and process, I miss my mom every single day, that’s not to say I’m sad and distraught on a daily basis because I am not. For selfish reasons I miss her, she’s in a far better place and she’s at peace and I know she’s in God’s care. I try to celebrate her whenever possible, I speak her name often and laugh and remember silly special things she did. The thing is if I had never experienced her loss, I could not share these things with you. My hope and my prayer is that God will use this space to help someone else.

“We can ignore even pleasure. But pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our prayer pains: it is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”
C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

“We were promised sufferings. They were part of the program. We were even told, ‘Blessed are they that mourn,’ and I accept it. I’ve got nothing that I hadn’t bargained for. Of course it is different when the thing happens to oneself, not to others, and in reality, not imagination.”
C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

Colossians 2:2-6 “My goal is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. I tell you this so that no one may deceive you by fine-sounding arguments. For though I am absent from you in body, I am present with you in spirit and delight to see how disciplined you are and how firm your faith in Christ is. So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him,”

Psalm 140:1-8 “Rescue me, Lord, from evildoers; protect me from the violent, who devise evil plans in their hearts and stir up war every day. They make their tongues as sharp as a serpent’s; the poison of vipers is on their lips. Keep me safe, Lord, from the hands of the wicked; protect me from the violent, who devise ways to trip my feet. The arrogant have hidden a snare for me; they have spread out the cords of their net and have set traps for me along my path. I say to the Lord, “You are my God.” Hear, Lord, my cry for mercy. Sovereign Lord, my strong deliverer, you shield my head in the day of battle. Do not grant the wicked their desires, Lord; do not let their plans succeed.”
~Blessings and Peace~

My only recommendation is to look for the good in everyone and then tell them. We are to love one another just as Christ loved us. Don’t alienate people, respect others and by doing so isn’t an approval of all they say and do but you can and should respect their choices. Remember we are all created by God for His purposes, leave the judgments to God. None of us are qualified.

John 14:1-7 “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going.” Thomas said to him, “Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way?” Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. If you really know me, you will know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him.”

Psalm 139:7-12 “Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.”
~Blessings and Peace~

The devotional for today was regarding letters that C.S.Lewis received containing questions from his fans/admirers. From what I have read about Lewis, is that he spent a considerable amount of time responding to letters he received and tried to provide information to the seeker and not necessarily an answer. One question was “Do people get a second chance after death?” and another was “What happens if I die an atheist?”  Lewis offers two statements about the first question regarding a second chance and refers to reincarnation in that the individual would attempt a fresh start after failing in the first one. He also refers to purgatory in which the work of redemption continues most noticeably after death. The second question regarding atheism and death, Lewis is quick to answer with “we are never given any knowledge of ‘What would have happened if…'”. Lewis, in my opinion was encourage people to examine information available and through pray and study of the Bible and reference literature each person would be able to make a more informative decision about what they believe to be true and not what someone tells them to believe as truth.  After all, it’s a personal relationship with God, not a denomination or specific place or people. I have often sought out the easy route of getting answers to my questions from others, it was easy but not necessarily my truth, then I had a couple of incredible individuals come into my life that flat out refused to participate in this technique of mine. So, slowly over time I started seeing benefits of making my own decisions and my own choices. And along with today’s title sometimes our questions can be dark and murky but fear need not be the reason to stop our search for our truths. The Bible tells us that “Fear not” or “Be not afraid” appears at least 103 times, more if you take into account the different versions and meanings of the words. I am in not way trying to tell you answering your own questions will be easy, it’s not; however, I can tell you it is so worth your time and effort to seek and find your truth, it will strengthen your personal relationship with God in ways you never thought possible.

Isaiah 56:1-7 “This is what the Lord says: “Maintain justice and do what is right, for my salvation is close at hand and my righteousness will soon be revealed. Blessed is the one who does this— the person who holds it fast, who keeps the Sabbath without desecrating it, and keeps their hands from doing any evil.” Let no foreigner who is bound to the Lord say, “The Lord will surely exclude me from his people.” And let no eunuch complain, “I am only a dry tree.” For this is what the Lord says: “To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths, who choose what pleases me and hold fast to my covenant— to them I will give within my temple and its walls a memorial and a name better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting name that will endure forever. And foreigners who bind themselves to the Lord to minister to him, to love the name of the Lord, and to be his servants, all who keep the Sabbath without desecrating it and who hold fast to my covenant— these I will bring to my holy mountain and give them joy in my house of prayer. Their burnt offerings and sacrifices will be accepted on my altar; for my house will be called a house of prayer for all nations.”

Psalm 27:4-9 “One thing I ask from the Lord, this only do I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple. For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent and set me high upon a rock. Then my head will be exalted above the enemies who surround me; at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy; I will sing and make music to the Lord. Hear my voice when I call, Lord; be merciful to me and answer me. My heart says of you, “Seek his face!” Your face, Lord, I will seek. Do not hide your face from me, do not turn your servant away in anger; you have been my helper. Do not reject me or forsake me, God my Savior.”

~Blessings and Peace~

References:
Preparing for Esther by C.S.Lewis

To be vulnerable means capable of being physically or emotionally wounded. So when we choose to be vulnerable in situations and with people we run the risk of being hurt. If we are constantly keeping ourselves away from these possibilities of harm or hurt we sometimes end up hurting ourselves. When our defenses are isolating us and building walls to keep people out we sometimes don’t understand why we don’t have friends or are never asked to participate in activities and events. Just like with everything else in life it’s about balance and making decisions based upon true data and not simply fear. Fear keeps us from being brave and yes, being vulnerable. This all comes with trusting yourself and having boundaries. Setting simple goals for yourself will provide you with safety perimeters and gradually trusting others with your thoughts and building upon that trust is often the best route to go. I am sharing this out of personal experiences, it’s definitely not easy and absolutely not quickly achieved if ever fully achieved. I was having a conversation with someone I trust today, I spoke about where I am mentally and spiritually compared to four years ago. It’s true about hindsight being 20/20 but knowing what I know now versus what I thought I knew then(?) let’s just say I’m grateful for God’s unfailing love and the unconditional love and support from a few very special people in my life. Back in 2013, my church decided to explore and to participate in “My One Word.” The word I chose was “Clarity.” I think my choice was twofold looking back, I sincerely wanted more clarity with regards to my spiritual life and clarity in my personal life regarding education, work, and personal relationships to name a few. I also felt this would be relatively easy to pursue and obtain answers (I tend to like shortcuts). I figured I would have this all figured out rather quickly, I applied to go back to college to pursue religious studies and companion it with my BA I had already earned. I thought clarity was as easy as going to the optometrist, get an eye exam and glasses for correction and then see things crystal clear! HaHa! So fast forward to 2017, I’m still pursuing “Clarity” and although I have learned so much there’s just so much more I “want” to learn. And as I look back over the past four years I have learned more than I ever imagined possible. I can’t say it was easy but at the same time it has been joyful. I am blessed with incredible people in my life and I give all the credit to God, He knew what I needed and how best to teach me. I have gained knowledge through education just not in the conventional method I had boxed myself into believing. Adding another college degree is still on my list but it’s priority has changed. What I really wanted was knowledge and opportunities to share in conversation while learning with others. God opened a different door for me. I met a pastor from another local church and I have been able to participate in a women’s retreat, two separate bible studies and a monthly gathering called “Pub-Theology” where we meet for dinner, share a meal and a beverage together and then talk about a specific subject item (news story; faith practices; cultural differences; interpretations of passages in the Bible, etc). Over these past few years, I have strengthened old relationships; renewed broken relationships; created new relationships. I have become more comfortable in my own skin, faced some of my fears and looked my past pains in the mirror and do you know what I discovered? I’m ok, better than ok…I’m a princess and my father is the “King of Kings”. *A bit of Charlotte humor, but it’s true nonetheless! I’m thankful for the difficult periods I’ve lived through the past few years because they have made me stronger, wiser, confident and compassionate. Please know that you too are worthy and loved and are a prince or princess! God loves you! May you see and feel the love of God all around you!

Ephesians 5:1-6 “Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out-of-place, but rather thanksgiving. For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a person is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath comes on those who are disobedient.”

Psalm 5:5-12 “The arrogant cannot stand in your presence. You hate all who do wrong; you destroy those who tell lies. The bloodthirsty and deceitful you, Lord, detest. But I, by your great love, can come into your house; in reverence I bow down toward your holy temple. Lead me, Lord, in your righteousness because of my enemies— make your way straight before me. Not a word from their mouth can be trusted; their heart is filled with malice. Their throat is an open grave; with their tongues they tell lies. Declare them guilty, O God! Let their intrigues be their downfall. Banish them for their many sins, for they have rebelled against you. But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy. Spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may rejoice in you. Surely, Lord, you bless the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield.”
~Blessings and Peace~

Tonight I met with my women’s group from my church called Esther’s Circle. We are a group of women who meet once a month in one of our homes and share in conversation, snacks, devotional time and dessert. It is a wonderful group of women from a multitude of backgrounds and life experiences. We had decided a few months ago to begin a book study of the Book of Esther in the Old Testament in the Bible. As the group appointed leader I purchased two study books and a commentary in hopes to share a variety of material about Esther. We were few in number tonight so we did not officially start the study but we still managed to talk for well over three hours, just the three of us. It was a wonderful and relaxed evening sharing good food and great conversation. I think too often we get busy with the “busyness” of life that we don’t take time to listen to other people’s stories. I left our time together with increased knowledge of the challenges we all face on a daily basis, too often we get so spun up and tangled with our own stuff it’s easy to forget that others are tangled as well. Tonight felt like a lifeline had been tossed to me and all I needed to do was, hang on! We each took a turn sharing life experiences and struggles and as we continued talking about the day-to-day stuff our conversation easily turned to God, God’s role in our lives and how we might be more drawn into who we were created to be, I felt very honored to have them share their parenting stories with me, since I am not a parent and most likely will not be one but I do admire the sacrifices they made for their children and the positive and responsible adults their children have grown into…that stuff doesn’t just happen by accident. We covered all the major issues in today’s headline news and well, we came up with some pretty good ideas to solve those issues as well, that’s what women do! The most important aspect is, we listen and support one another and pray for each other. I look forward to sharing our study of Esther with each of you in the coming months. I’m excited to read, discuss and apply lessons from Esther’s story to our everyday lives.

 

 

 

 

Esther 4:12-14 “When Esther’s words were reported to Mordecai, he sent back this answer: “Do not think that because you are in the king’s house you alone of all the Jews will escape. For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?”

~Blessings and Peace~

Look for more than the good in everything and everyone, find the GLORY in it all! We are all God’s creation, created for His glory. As I am typing these words, I am also asking God to bless everyone reading this. My prayer is that His light and love are revealed to you in a special way today. This blog is a method of spreading God’s Word and message, I am blessed to be able to share my thoughts with the world. I’m human, so of course I love to receive your comments; however, I know that none of this would be possible if not for the encouragement and support of my friends and readers but most especially if God had not placed this journey before me. I’m so happy to be able to share God’s word with you!

Romans 8:26-34 “Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. Now He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren. Moreover whom He predestined, these He also called; whom He called, these He also justified; and whom He justified, these He also glorified. What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things? Who shall bring a charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. Who is he who condemns? It is Christ who died, and furthermore is also risen, who is even at the right hand of God, who also makes intercession for us.”

Psalm 91:9-16 “Because you have made the Lord, who is my refuge, Even the Most High, your dwelling place, No evil shall befall you, Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; For He shall give His angels charge over you, To keep you in all your ways. In their hands they shall bear you up, Lest you dash your foot against a stone. You shall tread upon the lion and the cobra, The young lion and the serpent you shall trample underfoot. “Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him; I will set him on high, because he has known My name. He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honor him. With long life I will satisfy him, And show him My salvation.”

~Blessings and Peace~

Imagination…just the word itself conjures up images in my mind. And I’ll be honest, when I hear “imagination” I often (9 times out of 10) think of WDW (Walt Disney World). I love going there, I feel like a kid again when I’m there. I loved the reading for today and how Lewis connects prayer and imagination together. He speaks of the use of imagery when we pray. Often when I hear a bible story or sermon on something specific I think of Sunday school classes when I was a kid. Our church used these preprinted cards to bring the bible stories to life. A few favorites were “Daniel in the lion’s den,” “Jonah and the whale,” and “Zacchaeus and the Sycamore tree!” We all have imaginations, some of us explore them more than others and we all express ourselves in many ways. We are all uniquely created by God and discover ways of surrendering ourselves to the imaginary of the Christian life. Each persons relationship with God is personal, we don’t all see God in the exact same way. Some people see God the strongest through nature, others through books, still others through the actions of others. Of course this is not a complete list, for myself I see and interact with God through a variety of activities. I have experienced God through conversations with coworkers, sometimes through direct discuss about the Bible and other times through their actions. I also experience God through friends while sharing meals and conversations, through bible study groups, church services, through children and their innocence and honesty. During the past year I’ve been trying to see and be the literal “hands and feet” of Jesus. Jesus did not spend every minute in the Temple, He was with sinners, the forgotten, the diseased, the poor, tax collectors and prostitutes. Jesus came to save the lost. I have also been participating with an online course of contemplative photography and photographers which has increased my creativity and imagination so much deeper level than I ever thought possible. I feel truly blessed to have the freedom and courage to share my thoughts through this medium of blogging and through photos and other hobbies I enjoy, I sincerely try to represent God and His love with my words and actions, it is only because of Him that I have this opportunity. We are only limited by ourselves, Jesus tells us in Matthew 7:7-8 “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.” When I arrived home from work today, I picked up my mail and I received a promotional in the mail from WDW, and the caption was “Imagination is Waiting!” I laughed and smiled at the timing of this small inconsequential piece of mail that God used to help me see Him more clearly. A clarifying moment for me that God is ever-present and with me always. And, the wonderful thing is He’s always present and available to EVERYONE! 

Mark 8:34-38 thru Mark 9:1 “And he said to them, “Truly I tell you, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see that the kingdom of God has come with power.” Then he called the crowd to him along with his disciples and said: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it. What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? If anyone is ashamed of me and my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, the Son of Man will be ashamed of them when he comes in his Father’s glory with the holy angels.”

Psalm 91:1-8 “Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked.”

Quotes by C.S.Lewis “Letters to Malcolm”

“This act [creation], as it is for God, must always remain totally inconceivable to man. For we–even our poets and musicians and inventors–never, in the ultimate sense make. We only build. We always have materials to build from. All we can know about the act of creation must be derived from what we can gather about the relation of the creatures to their Creator.”

“A concentrated mind and a sitting body make for better prayer than a kneeling body and a mind half asleep.”

~Blessings and Peace~
References:
Preparing for Easter by C.S.Lewis
Letter to Malcolm by C.S.Lewis
The C.S.Lewis Encyclopedia by Colin Duriez

“If a thing is free to be good, it is also free to be bad. And free will is what has made evil possible.” That is a quote from Mere Christianity by C.S.Lewis (Book II: Chapter 3 “The Shocking Alternative”). Today’s devotional poses the question, “what is mankind that you (God) are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them?” ” Why, then did God give them (humans) free will? Because free will, though it makes evil possible, is also the only thing that makes possible any love or goodness or joy worth having.” I enjoy how Lewis is straightforward and simple with his explanation of the question. God created us, He loves us and desires a relationship with us not because He created us but because we chose to love Him in return and to recognize we are nothing without Him.

Hebrews 2:5-11 “It is not to angels that he has subjected the world to come, about which we are speaking. But there is a place where someone has testified: “What is mankind that you are mindful of them, a son of man that you care for him? You made them a little lower than the angels; you crowned them with glory and honor and put everything under their feet.” In putting everything under them, God left nothing that is not subject to them. Yet at present we do not see everything subject to them. But we do see Jesus, who was made lower than the angels for a little while, now crowned with glory and honor because he suffered death, so that by the grace of God he might taste death for everyone. In bringing many sons and daughters to glory, it was fitting that God, for whom and through whom everything exists, should make the pioneer of their salvation perfect through what he suffered. Both the one who makes people holy and those who are made holy are of the same family. So Jesus is not ashamed to call them brothers and sisters.”

Psalm 8:1-9 “Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory in the heavens. Through the praise of children and infants you have established a stronghold against your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger. When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them? You have made them a little lower than the angels and crowned them with glory and honor. You made them rulers over the works of your hands; you put everything under their feet: all flocks and herds, and the animals of the wild, the birds in the sky, and the fish in the sea, all that swim the paths of the seas. Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!”

Here’s a rarity the actual voice recording of C.S.Lewis from a surviving radio broadcast from the BBC. I hope you enjoy it.

~Blessings and Peace~
References:
Preparing for Easter by C.S.Lewis
Mere Christianity by C.S.Lewis

Today’s passage mentions “predestination” a couple of times, I am not a theologian but I have participated in a few conversations on the subject. I am not advocating or condemning the belief and understanding of it. What I will do is tell you that I believe I was created by God, given a purpose and that I am loved by God. The world, the universe and all its wonders were created by God for His purposes and glory. There’s absolutely nothing on my part to be worthy of love, I know there are times that I think to myself, “of course I’m lovable!” That is mostly pride or over confidence and the truth all wrapped up together. I am completely ok with the belief in predestination and I am also completely ok with the belief in free will. Maybe this analogy will help or quite possibly I could lose you in translation! I have been interested in Chinese Dynasty films for a few years and the Dynasties were rulers usually from the same family, one might say their heirs were “predestined” to someday rule. Usually rulers had many wife’s to ensure a son would be born to eventually rule and carry on the family name and traditions. But…just because the father is a wise and fair ruler does that mean his heirs will be too? Each person is faced with choices, “free will” just because a parent is wise and fair there are no guarantees that their children will do the same. If the heir follows in the footsteps of their fathers/ancestors is it because of free will or predestined (hereditary). Pride has a way of showing up when people think and take credit for things that were really beyond their comprehension. If the heir does something completely different, the blame game starts because bad choices were made? I am not trying to confuse anyone or seem like I am afraid to commit, the truth is salvation, faith and knowing, not just believing that God is real is personal and public all at the same time. Whether or not I was “predestined” “chosen” by God, I know that I had a moment of decision and wanted to publicly announce my “come to Jesus” moment. I strive to be the best person I can be, I study and read my Bible, read books about the Bible and I watch movies about faith and the Bible; plus I do a lot of other stuff too that I’m not so proud of…I procrastinate, I say bad things, I speed while driving sometimes, I miss church a lot, I over eat a lot…you get the picture, I’m not perfect. God is not looking for perfect, he’s looking for honesty, courage, and love to mention a few. What I know for absolute truth is…I am a sinner, I cannot save myself, grace is given not deserved, mercy is applied and given instead of punishment. I will never be or do enough to be worthy of salvation so I’m thankful that God created me and loves me and I strive to live into the purposes He created me for. My Father is the King of Kings and I am His heir, my destiny and destination is Heaven.

Romans 8:26-39 “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified. What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Psalm 44:20-26 “If we had forgotten the name of our God or spread out our hands to a foreign god, would not God have discovered it, since he knows the secrets of the heart? Yet for your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered. Awake, Lord! Why do you sleep? Rouse yourself! Do not reject us forever. Why do you hide your face and forget our misery and oppression? We are brought down to the dust; our bodies cling to the ground. Rise up and help us; rescue us because of your unfailing love.”

~Blessings and Peace~
References:
Preparing for Easter by C.S.Lewis
The C.S.Lewis Encyclopedia by Colin Duriez