Dearest friends! I am writing to share with you good news about the “Good News!”
Lately, I have been in a dark place and I tell you this not for pity or excuses. I am sharing life’s challenges in hopes to help others navigate life. I was diagnosed with depression many years ago, I try to keep it in the lower case “d” whenever possible but that is not always easily managed. I recently discovered that just a year ago I was also struggling, thanks to FB sharing posts from 1 year ago, I saw a correlation with my state of mind. On February 6, 2019, I wrote the following and posted it on Twitter & FB on February 19, 2019.
The good news I want to share with you is, you are never alone and you do not need to fear. God is always with you. Below are some of my favorite verses, I hope you find comfort and strength in them as I do.
“But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid; for see—I am bringing you good news of great joy for all the people.” ~Luke 2:10
“And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” ~Matthew 28:20b
“For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”~Romans 8:38-39
“Do not fear, for I am with you, do not be afraid, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand.” ~Isaiah 41:10
“I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” ~Philippians 4:13
Today, and everyday but most especially today I give thanks to God for His love, His grace, His mercy and His forgiveness. Over the past few days I have been blessed time and again. I tell you God is real and His love is real and unconditional. I pray you know Him is a personal way and have accepted Him as your Lord and Savior! Amen!
I have had several friends reach out to me, checking on me and asking how I’m doing. A couple of days ago, I went to see a movie and had dinner with a friend, we had great conversation over dinner. It felt good to be “alive and participating in life!” Yesterday, two very dear friends invited me to dinner and I had a wonderful time sharing in a meal and in conversation with them as well as with our waitress, “thanks Madison!” It felt good to be “alive and participating in life!” Yesterday morning, “morning” is relative only to the fact I got up and out of bed! I decided to be productive and doing some things around the house I had been neglecting for far too long. I did laundry, dishes, vacuumed, dusted, rearranged furniture…busy, busy, busy!!! It felt good to be “alive and participating in life!” As I was cleaning I ran across a steno pad, I thought nothing of it at first thinking it was one I had used for calculating my budget and spending but it was rather thin. Upon closer examination, I discovered it contained a note that I had written back in 2009. 2009 was a very difficult time in my life, second only to losing my mom. I had just been informed by the person I thought I would spend the rest of my life with, no longer felt the same. My world, as I knew it ceased to be and I was devastated and I lashed out. I sat at my dining room table and read the few pages. It immediately transported me back in time to a place and feelings I had neatly tucked away. I simply sat with my thoughts but really needed to process what had just happened. I had not seen that notepad probably since 2009, and how did it end up on my dining room table. I still don’t know for sure but my guess is I had placed it with some of my Christmas stuff, maybe it had been in the drawer with old cards or ribbons and I just didn’t notice. The how it surfaced is really irrelevant to me, I believe that God wanted me to see those words I had written so long ago to remind me that I’m not the same person today. I wrote some hurtful things but they were how I felt at the time. I also noticed something else after reading my note, the response I received. At the time, I was so hurt I could not see past my own feelings. Today, I realized that it took a lot of strength and courage to say the things that were told to me. I am just so sorry it took me so long to recognize it. We have both moved on and we remain friends and the bond of our friendship continues to grow with each passing year.
So, after some contemplating, I reached out to a very trusted friend. I shared most of the above information and felt relief after sharing. I decide I wanted to share this story with the other individual in my story but was not sure if I should talk with my counselor about it first…so, I had decided to wait…… waiting…… my phone rings, it is my friend and ex. It was a call to check in on me to make sure I was doing ok. I thought to myself, this is a window of opportunity sent by God. So I shared, I cried, I felt relief as I shared my thoughts and insight. The relief was as if a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. My friend was so supportive and reassuring, such grace and compassion. It felt good to be “alive and participating in life!” I am so Blessed!! All praise and glory are to God alone. I am very hardheaded and stubborn, to put it mildly. I am really good at forgiving others, not so much with myself. Today, I learned (again) by refusing to forgive myself, doesn’t just hurt me but it also hurts my ability to feel alive and to participate in life. It’s not easy and if you struggle with forgiveness as I do, I pray you begin to see the benefits of unloading some old baggage you’ve been carrying for way too long. I wish you much peace, joy and love…”It is good to be alive and participating in life!”
Special thanks to all my readers and supporters! God is working miracles through you!
Special thanks to those I’ve hurt in the past, please forgive me and I pray for your happiness. It bring me joy to know you have joy! You are loved! ❣️